Friday, August 24, 2007

A Life Renewed

August 15, 2007 - Wt approx 187 lbs

I'm finding getting used to the whole smaller size thing strangely comical. I leaned my head sideways on my shoulder and was completely grossed out to touch this bony thing: my clavicle! I'm losing weight in the wrong places!!!!!!! Also, I was so excited to be able to bend my knees up and curl up in the chair that I made my sister take a picture. A lot of adapting to do.

Aug 22, 2007 - Wt approx 184-185 lbs "curling up in chair"

On a more serious note, here are so many things that I now realize that I used food to help me suppress. Instead of letting God take them, I just tried to ignore or used food as my scapegoat. I now refuse to let food control who I am but I am finding myself struggling now as I deal with "stuff". It's easy to spout words of wisdom like "Leave it to God and He'll supply all your needs", but in reality I am stressing over everything! I'm continuing to really struggle with a lot of emotional issues that come from my weight loss. It's difficult to explain, but essentially I am thinner and healthy physically but my head hasn't been able to catch up to my body. I am truly rediscovering and redefining who I am as a person and trying to remember that who I am in God's eyes has never changed.

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